Not as Usual

Today dated 23 April 2013, the day after my birthday. As usual, I have no special gift. Rather unfortunate, this afternoon at 12:03 pm I got the gift of tears. I only ask because my accounting, I'm a finance at work. And as finance I should be careful in spending money. So I asked for more details about the payment. Instead, she yelled at me so I was surprised to hear her voice. I became very sad as it feels like screaming, it was eager to hurt someone. Want to be angry, if I had a magic power it wanted to turn this world. However I was still able to smile even though this feels so heavy. Well I understand the old saying "Life is hard and full of struggle". But at least I can still enjoy a little about life. There is no special person in my heart. At least I still have the sense to admire someone. I still have a smile that can make me laugh when I cry, smile that can make me momentarily forget the fatigue life, even though I knew the smile was not for me. At least it's fair for me God made ​​me to know him even though he'll never know me. I can only look at him happy, but he will never reply to my stare. That because of him I can still smile despite the pain enveloped me. I imagine how happy the woman who became his lover, because he will be able to continue to enjoy that smile for her. I quietly enjoyed her breathe, move as usual through all her hobbies. But I did not expect someday get lover like him, because I know he's only one and there will not be anything like him then I hope I'll get a much better lover like him. Although I do not know what good he does not, he's still special to me. My tears stopped flowing because I saw him Smile.